Food Sensitivities, Schoolwork and Kum Nye.

It’s been a wild month for me and the above picture sort of sums up how I’m working on managing things. I’m so used to just giving up and letting everything fall to pieces, so this new found willingness to work towards recovering from a chaotic situation is both refreshing and terrifying. It’s interesting watching my perspective shift and being able to act as an observer to my thoughts both when I’m being rational and when I’m feeling myself getting ready to fly off the deep end.

Basically, I’m now conscious of the fact that I get to make a decision to either hit or not hit what I’ve always called my “Fuck It” switch. It’s kind of cool to know that I can say no to self-destructive and damaging behaviors, and also to know that I get to choose to be “good enough” instead of constantly beating myself into a stressed out puddle of mess for not being perfect. I may still wind up having to drop one of my courses, but I don’t have to let my entire life fall apart because of an illness and the resulting stress and anxiety.

This past week I met with a Naturopathic Nutritionist to discuss the terrible eczema which I struggle with and she did some muscle testing and we discussed my past and present eating habits. The results of the muscle testing shows that I am sensitive to a huge portion of my diet (soy, wheat, gluten in general, corn, soy and dairy are the main ones). I’m on a gentle bowel cleansing diet now in which I eat pretty normal foods, just without the things I’m sensitive to and with fewer added fats and oils and fewer raw foods. The bulk of my diet is currently steamed vegetables, green smoothies with ground seeds and nuts and a small amount of the grains which I do process well.

So far I’m feeling pretty good, but I must admit that I am really craving plain old whole wheat bread.  I ate a lot of sandwiches and wraps and veggie burgers for the past few months and I’m missing how easy grabbing something quick used to be. These changes in my eating habits will be affecting this blog in the near future as gluten free cooking is a new and exciting adventure for me and I’ll be sharing my successes and adventures here on a fairly regular basis.

Because I’m sensitive to so many of the things I ate on a daily basis, this is going to be a challenge. Thank-goodness that being plant-based and whole-foods based will make this transition a lot easier on me than it would be on someone who eats a standard American diet. The health food shops and exotic ingredients are already part of my routine and I really love exploring new ways of doing things. The only thing I’m currently really struggling to replace in my diet is soy sauce. I have found a great product called coconut aminos, but it’s not available locally and I can’t find anywhere in Canada to have it shipped from.  Amazon won’t send it to me and Amazon.ca doesn’t carry it. I may have to beg a Calgary friend to pick some up and mail it to me soon.

My Kum Nye books arrived the other day and they are exactly what I needed right now. I still have to kick myself in the bum to get myself to meditate daily, but I know that with consistent effort on my part this will eventually become a routine I love rather than a discipline I struggle with.

 

Walk In Beauty.

 

forAnima – PostDetail Blog (reblogged post) The Stigma of Being an Overweight Vegan and the Rise of Fat Shaming

I’m reblogging this article as this is an issue which comes up for me time and time again and it was really empowering for me to read this. Many people make assumptions about me, my lifestyle and my overall attitude based on my body-size and I get very tired of feeling as if I need to justify my weight to people who hardly know me.

I eat primarily whole foods and am physically active AND fat. I’m working very hard at increasing my muscle mass, but gaining long-term health is not an overnight job, nor is it a vegan issue.

Love one another, and love yourselves.

forAnima – PostDetail Blog. (click link to read original article)

Fat and body shaming itself is a horrible and an unfortunate reality but fat shaming within the vegan community is even more indicative of what needs to change in society. As the vegan diet continues to rise and portray itself as a trendy way to lose weight, the more we see vegans being pictured as super slim and health conscious individuals. It brings to mind the question; since when has health become something that can be depicted?

Advertisements from the likes of the Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine and PETA have created a world where going vegan or vegetarian is a means to look “perfect” to lose the “blubber” and portray overweight people as something to be feared, to be disgusted and we have tolerated this kind of body shaming and fat hatred for far too long. Is it responsible for us as a community to defend and support advertisements like these? I am by no means saying that we should support being overweight or obese as a healthy way to live or to stop talking about how obesity is one of the biggest health hazards for people, but to approach the subject from a negative and demeaning point of view is detrimental to everyone.

I often find myself holding back from claiming to be a vegan because the stigma within this community has made me too uncomfortable.  It has come to a point where because I don’t fit some preconceived notion of what a vegan looks like I’m somehow less of one. Since when has veganism become a diet rather than an ethical and moral decision to abstain from meat and meat products for the sake of the animal? Animal rights and activism was my only reason for becoming a vegetarian almost ten years ago and my decision to go vegan was yet again for the sake of preserving a connection to animals and the fight against the horrible and demeaning acts of the meat industry.

More and more the term “junk food vegan” has become a permanent label for overweight vegans and it’s an unnecessary term because your weight is not the only indicator of how healthy you are. Health is much more than your looks, pant size and your hip to waist ratio and more about HOW YOU FEEL. The vegan community is both one of love and hate which is why we have an undeterred stigma because the mindset of being “exclusive” and “above” has taken over.  We have fought so hard to for the rights of animals that we have somehow become people who put down those who don’t follow our philosophies and they have branched from hatred against the omnivore to overweight vegans as well.

We should be celebrating loving yourself no matter the body shape, weight or looks and increasing animal activism so we can create a world where more and more people are starting to build better connections with animals beyond their dinner plates. We should be supporting healthy eating and not healthy looks and educating people on portion size, healthier grains and flours and exercise instead of creating negative ideals and aspirations.  Positivity should be spilling from every advertisement, every commercial and every blog post.

We should move away from the “angry vegan” to the one that accepts every version of the word. If you went vegan to lose weight or you’re vegan only once a week or you’re someone who is above your recommended healthy weight, we should be accepting everyone no matter what. Every move toward veganism, every person involved in creating a better world for animals should be loved and accepted and those who aren’t as willing to change their way of eating – accept them too because beyond our diets and our ideals we are all human beings and we all deserve to live in a world brimming with positivity and acceptance.

Love yourself, support animal rights and most of all BE KIND.

Focus on Love.

Always the right answer

Today I finally got my letter approving my funding for school, so starting early next month I’ll be starting my classes. It’s a little scary starting school again, especially now that I’m in my 40s, but I’m also really excited and happy about making this fresh new start.  I’m still pretty darn busy with work and enjoying living my life (and being all giddy and pleased with my new relationship) and really need to remind myself to take the time needed to update here more frequently as this blog is first and foremost a tool to help keep me focused and centered.

I purchased an elliptical recently, and am really enjoying fiddling around with it between bike rides and shifts at work. I figure keeping busy with the elliptical will really help me fend off my Seasonal Affective Disorder this next winter as exorcise really does make me feel great, and not biking certainly effects my mood in the winder.

I’m having some serious allergy issues and will begin receiving testing for various food sensitivities on the 15th. I’m quite certain that it will come back as my having celiac disease  as I do have a genetic predisposition to it and I’ve always sort of angrily suspected that it would catch up one day. I’m not overly stressed about it, although I do admit that I will miss my gluten if/when I need to give it up.

I’m still working quite determinedly at figuring out what was most meaningful to my parents, and what the Universe was trying to teach me through my relationships with them. I do think that this part of the Celestine Prophecy has really been helping me to release a lot of my pent up frustration with how broken our family was and that this is helping me to find meaning and value in all that I experienced. I do believe that I have a mission on this planet, and that examining these things will help me to determine what it is. Currently I’m just focused on building a good foundation of stability for myself, so that I am in a position to follow my heart once I figure out where it’s heading.  I’m not wracking my brains over this, but I am enjoying thinking about my life journey from this new perspective. I have made many breakthroughs and am beginning to really gain a sense of direction.

Often when I have the least to say, I have the biggest changes occurring.

Walk in Beauty.

Angels in Artichoke Hearts.

Artichoke (Photo credit: elspethbriscoe)

There is no morality within food, yet we see many of  you seeking comfort with utensils that hold morsels of food dangling into the mouth that instead hungers for a reunion with God. These beings we seek to comfort with our healing presence, yet it is at times tough to get through! For this,  we remind you of a condition that you at one time called “Saying Grace.” We like to think of this tradition as not something that is retired, but perhaps a new trend upon your horizon.

Borrowed from: Angel Therapy by Doreen Virtue, Ph.D. and The Angelic Realm

Love vs Fear

This is a really good reminder for me!

I finished registering for my courses and finished my student loan application today. It was really stressful (I tend to have a ton of anxiety when I’m faced with bureaucracy and the hoop jumping and red-tape which comes along with it). I’m very pleased and excited to be all set to attend school in September (I’m studying to become a Disability and Community Rehabilitation worker, in order to gain the financial stability which I need in order to start working toward my longer-term goal of becoming an aromatherapist and herbalist).

I’ve been spending a good amount of my free time with a really amazing man and my heart is all fluttery and excited, in a way I haven’t felt in years. It’s still too soon to say where things with us will lead, but I haven’t felt this connected and peaceful in anyone’s company in many, many years, it’s so refreshing to have someone to spend time with who appreciates the whimsical nature of my personality, and who is as happy to learn as they are to teach.  It’s too soon to say that I’m in love, but I’m sure looking forward to enjoying the journey and finding out where it takes us.

As we press upon one another with our intentions, From our hearts fly luminous butterflies, That intermingle and crossover to be absorbed. In abeyance our hearts await.

Lujan Matus

I’ve finally got two days off side by side a week at my job, which is allowing me the leisure time I have needed to work on this blog, my beadwork and to start getting my kitchen back into shape so I can start cooking some real meals again. Tonight’s supper was a giant smoothie with 3/4 of a cup of white beans snuck into the mix. It was actually really tasty, and once I’ve tweaked the recipe I’ll share it here.

I’ve just started to learn chords on my ukelele, and I’ve been fiddling around with learning chain mail as well. I’ve also been putting real effort into increasing my Linux knowledge. It’s kind of amazing to think about all of the knowledge and beauty there is to explore.

I’ve been working really hard on wrapping my head around non-duality recently, as I’ve started to really see how the power of attraction works in my own life. Focusing on how messed up the world is will never create positive movement toward change and growth, it just keeps us stuck. My depression didn’t lift until I decided to create positive change for myself, and I believe that the same is true on a universal level. It’s funny how the same old lessons sometimes take on new (or maybe just deeper) meaning for me.

I really need to go spend some time in meditation tonight. Life has been awfully busy recently and I think I need to just BE for a bit.

Walk In Beauty

Concious Eating vs Asleep Eating.

Alive with loveliness.

For many of us (both with and without eating disorders) learning to be conscious of what exactly we’re eating can really be helpful in switching to a new, healthy lifestyle. I know that for me, the more I understand the actual ingredients in processed foods, the less appeal they hold for me.  Seriously, when a food item’s ingredients have ingredients, you’re treading into some scary (and often deceptive) territory.

“Natural Ingredients” does not actually mean that the contents are “natural” in the sense which you or I would like to believe that they are. The umbrella term “natural” also encompasses things like Genetically Modified Organisms, fluid from animal’s anal sacs, and also many other really unhealthy and unethically obtained items.

A good rule of thumb is that if some of the ingredients in the food item which you are about to purchase are A). Not actually food items, but are instead, chemical compounds, or B). listed under umbrella terms such as “natural and artificial flavours, colours, or ingredients”, someone is trying to pull the wool over your eyes, and that item is best left on the shelf of the store. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t (or even that I don’t) ever eat these sort of foods, but I am suggesting that when doing so we be fully aware of the fact that what we are consuming is not actually food.

In my opinion, food should be made up of things found in nature which have encountered very little processing or alteration by human hands. Most of the food which I keep in my home as staples have 3 or fewer ingredients, and it’s reassuring to know that these sort of foods would have fed my ancestors without them thinking something strange was going on.

Way back in January I was shocked by the ingredients on a package of two bite brownies at a convenience store. They had no fewer than FIFTY ingredients, whereas the ones I make from scratch at home contain maybe six. Seriously, this is the sort of bizarre laboratory produced food that your average person is eating these days! Most people are more afraid that a whole wheat pita will make them fat than they are concerned that the majority of the food they eat on a daily basis has been developed in a science laboratory, with many individual ingredients that they would never dream of adding to a recipe at home.

I find that focusing on eating foods which are ACTUALLY found in nature, are nourishing and nutrient dense, really helps balance my cravings, keeps my energy levels high, and generally helps remind me that as humans we are intrinsically connected with all life, and that the more alive our food choices are, the more alive our lives will be. This has helped me so much in not obsessing over the size of my body, or how many calories I eat.

It’s so much more fun to eat and live to fuel vibrancy, than it is to be constantly obsessed with how many calories I eat. Connected and aware eating is a huge part of my spiritual journey, and disconnected eating really is one of the last barriers which I have placed in my own path. I over-came drug and alcohol abuse in the 1990s, I overcame nicotine addiction in the early 2000s and I am almost done with this whole battle I’ve had going with food since I was a small child.  I deserve to be vibrant, awake and healthy, and I am becoming so.

Body Shame and Moving Into MY Perfection.

Perspective is EVERYTHING. Is this a field destroyed by industry and a sky marred by chem-trails OR is it a beautiful day to be human and moving forward?

We do not see things as they are, we see them as we are.

– Anais Nin

It’s finally gotten good and hot here in Southern Alberta, and as the temperatures go up, layers of clothing come off. As I am someone with a long history of disordered eating and distorted body image, and as a human being who grew up on Earth, surrounded by commercials, fashion magazines and media in general this of course brings up a ton of food for thought. My perspective is pretty unusual, as I am also someone who has studied and understood both the Beauty Myth and the patriarchal pyramid and I am fully awake to and aware of how distorted my (and most other people’s) ideas about bodies and health really are, or at least can be.

A love for physical activity has not come easily to me. I’ve always been a “big girl”  and as a kid I was teased for this, as well as having parents who encouraged me to diet, but seldom encouraged me to be physically active. The shame I felt about my “flawed” body was pretty over the top for many years. I wouldn’t participate in gym class as early as age six for fear that people would comment on my “fat” jiggling, or my sweating, breathing hard or appearing “too out of shape”. This sort of shame of course, did nothing to encourage me to work on improving my physical strength or my overall health.

Of course, with all of this inner emotional torture going on I never had a chance to find out that sweating, jiggling, breathing hard and getting my heart pounding due to physical exertion feels really, really good! I learned this on my own over the course of the past two years, as  I have rediscovered my love of bicycling! I adore working hard to make it up a big hill, or pushing my bike against strong wind. All of those physical sensations which I used to see as “signs that I’m too fat” are now pleasurable reminders that my body is growing stronger and healthier.

I frequently find myself needing to correct my thinking when I’m out cycling as I catch my thoughts running toward how I look to other people. If I allow my mind to wander off in that direction things get uncomfortable instead of joyful. I’m getting better and better each day at just not allowing my mind to stray into negative self-talk and anxiety. It’s sometimes really hard, and I need to remind myself over and over again to enjoy the view, enjoy the air, enjoy the sun, enjoy the pumping of my heart, the working of my lungs and the motion of my hips and to forget about my “muffin top”. Basically, if I practice staying in and enjoying the “now”. I’m in a good place and am moving forward.

This sort of personal experience is why so many of us are against “fat shaming” and focusing on physical appearance instead of wholistic wellness. I would never have made it to the point I have in regards to healing my relationship with my body if I had stayed in the place I used to dwell due to bullying, poor self-image, and media programming. I’m still not in “excellent” shape, but my body is perfectly designed by nature and when I celebrate that instead of obsessing over how I look when I bend this way or that, I’m moving forward into my perfection.

Feeling ashamed of our bodies really is quite a ridiculous concept when one considers that we are perfectly designed by the Universe to live beautiful, abundant and healthful lives, we just need BE it. Each and every one of us was designed to function as a perfect piece of the whole of the Universe.

I am working on ignoring my weight and am instead focusing on how my body feels, and how far I can push it on a daily basis. I’m more interested in gaining agility, strength, endurance and joy  than I am in worrying that I don’t look appropriately super-model-like. I’m eating as much healthy food as my body desires, and am not shaming myself for eating ANYTHING these days. Food is delicious fuel to drive us toward our perfected state. We have a natural human drive to pursue maximum calories with minimal effort and to burn those calories off through living life exuberantly!  These are really important steps/concepts in my personal journey.

I am a whole person, I am a vital person, and my life is here for the living.

My Simple Beauty and Body Care Routines (vegan friendly)

Happiness, the goal to which we all are striving is reached by endeavoring to make the lives of others happy, and if by renouncing the luxuries of life we can lighten the burdens of others…. surely the simplification of our wants is a thing greatly to be desired! And so, if instead of supposing that we must become hermits and dwellers in caves in order to practice simplicity, we set about simplifying our affairs, each according to his own convictions and opportunity, much good will result and the simple life will at once be established.

Gandhi (1869 – 1948)

Note: I will come back to this post later on this week and make an itemized list of the homemade products (as well as the simple recipes needed to throw them together) which I keep pre-made in my washroom so that this is a bit easier to follow tomorrow. I have a busy day ahead and I just don’t have the time to simplify this today.

When I first adopted a vegan/plant based lifestyle I ran out and spent a good chunk of money on bath and beauty products, as well as home cleaning products, today I realize how unnecessary  and wrong-minded this was.  A big part of my ethics involves trying to use as few “mass produced” and resource wasteful things as possible, as well as trying to support smaller, more ethical (and less packaging-heavy) companies.

Frankly, a bunch of fancy “vegan-specific” products really aren’t required in order to feel clean and fresh and smell amazing, in fact many of the products which are available in fancy vegan packages kind of suck. It’s also cool to realize that almost everything I use to clean my home and my body is safe to eat and routinely used in cooking (aside from the soap of course).

Staples for a Vegan Friendly Body Care Routine:

• Small bottles and jars of assorted sizes (an empty stick deodorant tube is a MAJOR bonus item here)
• Turmeric Powder
• Coconut Oil
• Cocoa Butter
• Sesame Oil
• Doctor Bronner’s Liquid Castile Soap (Yes these DO contain palm oil, but it’s ethically sourced, therefor VEGAN)
• Natural Apple Cider Vinegar (I prefer Bragg’s, but use what you like best)
• A good skin brush
• Organic Brown Rice Flour (made by running brown rice through a good blender or processor until it’s a fine powder)
• A toothbrush (I like the type with the replaceable heads)
• Washcloth, bath puff, towels etc
• Essential oils if you’re so inclined.
• Water

Dental Care:

My entire dental care routine involves dipping a damp toothbrush into a tiny jar of turmeric powder and brushing my teeth with it. It makes my teeth look bright yellow while brushing, but they come out really white, clean and my mouth feels and smells fresh. This is seriously better than any of the commercial pastes or powders I’ve tried (and I’ve been using natural tooth care products for 20+ years because I avoid fluoride and unnecessary chemicals as best I can).

Avoid getting the powder/paste on your sink, counter clothes etc as it will stain them bright yellow. I tend to dip my brush over an old facecloth to contain the powder in a set area.

Some people follow this up with pulling coconut oil, but I’m not yet on the oil pulling bandwagon, and I like to keep things simple.

Skin Care:

I tend to avoid getting soaps etc on my face as I have incredibly sensitive skin, so my routine here is simple and straight-forward:

1. Pour a small amount of brown rice flour into your hand (maybe 1/4 teaspoon) then moisten it with water until it forms a runny paste and follow by using it to gently exfoliate your skin. Rinse well with water, and pat face dry.
2. Moisten a cotton pad with a mixture of  apple cider vinegar and water (1 part acv, 3 parts water) and use as an astringent. Allow to sit a few minutes and rinse. I often add a few drops of lavender oil to this because it smells nice, and does good things for your skin.
3. I have made my own moisturizer by mixing melted coconut oil (1/2 cup), cocoa butter (1/8 cup) and sesame oil (2 teaspoons)  together and whipping them thoroughly with my hand mixer. This is pretty oily at first, but my skin REALLY needs a lot of moisture or it gets irritated by the wind and sun I bike through daily and just sucks it up like a happy little sponge.  Pretty much all commercial skin creams irritate my rosacea, this stuff does not. Straight coconut oil, coco-butter or any natural oil will work as a moisturizer, but this is the blend which seems to work best for me. Please, feel free to experiment and find something simple and natural which works with your specific skin type, it’s fun and affordable since all of the ingredients are common food items in a whole foods pantry.

Important Note: For the sake of simplicity I have pre-made all of my soap/water vinegar/water etc mixtures and keep them handy in the bathroom, please keep this in mind when reading my routine, as it sounds much more complex than it really is. In general pre-making everything from cleaning to body care to food items really helps simplify whole-foods living. I also pre-cook batches of beans, grains etc and freeze them into small portion sizes, to save my time and effort, but that’s another post 😉

Hair Care:

My hair care routine is super simple:

1. Wash hair with diluted Dr.Bronner’s liquid castile soap (4 parts water, 1 part soap) which I store in old agave nectar bottles.
2. Rinse hair with 1 part apple cider vinegar mixed with 3 parts water, which I store in another agave nectar bottle.
3. I use a couple of vegan hair styling products as I have yet to find really excellent recipes for my own and have unruly wavy hair.

The first two weeks or so that I used this hair care method my hair seemed pretty angry and dry, after the two weeks ended it became incredibly soft and adjusted to the new routine. I believe this was just the pure soap and vinegar stripping off all of those years of build up. My hair is much healthier and has been growing in thicker during the year or so in which I’ve been treating it with this simple routine.

Body Care:

1. I am a big fan of skin brushing and here’s a good tutorial on how to do it if it seems appealing to you: Dry Brushing.  I usually brush my skin prior to bathing or showering. It makes me feel good and although I don’t necessarily agree with all of the claims about it, I enjoy doing it and my skin is really soft and glows after my shower if I’ve done it.
2. I wash my entire body with the same Dr.Bronner’s solution I describe in my hair care routine. If you try this – avoid getting the peppermint version on your “naughty bits” as it gets pretty tingly (not painful, just weird).
3. If I need to moisturize after bathing I usually use some sesame oil or whatever other clean simple oil I have kicking around.
4. I’ve found most commercial deodorants to be way too harsh, or not very effective (yes, this includes the deodorant stone) and so I’ve made my own by melting coconut oil down, throwing in a few tablespoons of baking powder, mixing well, adding a few drops of lavender oil, and pouring it into an empty stick deodorant tube and allowing it to harden. It works like a charm for me although it is a tiny bit soft, so I usually need to wipe the (small amount of) excess off before I dress.
5. I usually apply my favourite essential oils after my bathing routine. Right now pink grapefruit, sweet orange and cardamom are my favourites.

So yeah, you don’t need a ton of heavily packaged, cruelty-based, and environmentally destructive stuff in order to be clean and smell awesome in your day to day life. This may sound like a lot of effort, but really you’re just mixing a few things together and throwing them into containers. I generally only need to refill my containers every few months, other than my skin cream, which lasts ages if you make this much (I store the extra in my fridge, along side the extra deodorant stick I make ahead).

I try to pair this simple routine with good clean whole foods, lots of bike riding (I’m a commuter cyclist), tons of drinking water, pilates, TRX and a regular reading and meditation routine. This is all working for me and bit by bit I’m returning to the perfect balance which we’re all born with. It’s really nice to take an active role in my own health, and to know that I’m not lining a bunch of corporate pockets which aren’t worthy of my hard-earned money.

 

Healing My Eating Disorder.

I mentioned way back when I started this blog that I have struggled off and on for years with various forms of disordered eating and I do still sometimes deal with compulsive eating. I have made a ton of headway with my addictions through learning to accept them and not abusing myself when I have a backslide. This method of self healing was reaffirmed for me this week through reading and reflecting upon the chapters on addictions and health/food in one  the books I’m currently reading (Being in Balance by Dr, Wayne Dyer).

You’re Not What You Eat;

You’re What You Believe About What You Eat.

~ Dr, Wayne Dyer

My primary”drugs of choice” have been potato chips and I’m finding that they have lost much of their pull on me in recent months. Heck, I even survived a pretty brutal break-up without falling way off the deep end with a big bag of chips clutched to my chest. With the releasing of the shame which I used to hold so close to my heart when I “binged” much of the appeal of self-abuse seems to have quite simply vanished.

Tonight I had decided to go to the store and grab some chips to stuff my face with, but as seems to happen more and more often these days, I put them back on the shelf and made a healthier, more self-loving choice. Instead of a family sized bag of chips, I came home with a quarter of a watermelon, an avocado, and a cucumber. I had a lot of fun eating and enjoying the watermelon with my mother and my dog (my dog adores fruit and vegetables as I’ve raised him with them as dietary staples) and basically having a little celebration of life and healing.

It’s kind of neat to find that the healthier aspects of my personality are starting to be the parts of me which make most of my choices these days. I feel like I used to hold myself prisoner with my own self-destructive behaviours, and I have begun to free myself to be the balanced, healthy and complete person I was holding myself back from embracing.

Life is really beautiful, and I’m really grateful to be who I am, and where I am at this point in my life. Truthfully, I wouldn’t change a thing right now.  I seem to have found my center and I’m just loving my life and who I am. I seem to be so much happier single than I ever was in a relationship. I’m starting to understand why this is, and I think that it will change and evolve as I do.

Crispy Baked Tofu

I love tofu and I try to eat it between one and three times per week. There is a fair amount of anti-soy hype, which much like the anti-gluten hype, I mainly just ignore. I believe in listening to how our individual bodies respond to what we feed them and following that “internal advice” first and foremost in all things. Of course, I do read assorted health and nutritional studies, and I am very careful to buy non-gmo and organic as much as possible.

I’ve been eating tofu since I was 16 and have found a ton of really satisfying ways to prepare it. This crispy baked version is one of my favourites. I used to use an egg bath prior to applying the coating, but eggs aren’t something I consume anymore, and I now use a chickpea batter in their place.

Marinaded tofu, chickpea bath, breading mixture.

Marinade:

• Vegan BBQ Sauce, teryaki or other sauce you enjoy
• Onion Powder
• Garlic Powder
• Agave Nectar
• Low Sodium Soy Sauce
• Liquid smoke (optional, but delicious)
• Water
• Any other flavours which appeal to you (be creative, it’s your mouth that’s going to be eating this)

How to Marinade:

1. Cut some pressed tofu (pressed under a heavy object for 20 minutes to remove extra water) into slices, cubes, triangles or whatever shape most appeals to you, then place in a container with a lid.
2. Mix the marinade ingredients together until they reach a flavour profile and texture which appeals to you.
3. Pour the marinade over your pressed tofu and leave marinade for a minimum of twenty  minutes (I usually marinade overnight)

Coating:

• Chickpea flour
• Breadcrumbs
• Wholewheat flour
• Cornmeal (optional)
• Brown rice flour (optional)
• Sea salt
• Seasonings/herbs
• Water

How to Make the Chickpea Bath:

1. Add chickpea flour to one cup of water  and whisk until it is the consistency of runny pancake batter or whisked egg. This usually takes about 1/8 of a cup of the chickpea flour, but it’s really an intuitive process and you should be able to tell by feel how you’re doing.
2. Add any seasonings you with to the bath (I used a touch of sea salt and a touch of Chinese Five Spice in mine).
3. Set aside.

How to Make the Breading Mixture:

1. Add equal parts of wholewheat flour, and bread crumbs to a bowl, mix in  your cornmeal and brown rice flour if you’re using them.
2. Add any seasonings you wish. I just added some fresh ground pepper and a touch of sea salt.
3. Pour well mixed ingredients onto a plate and set aside.

How to Put it all Together:

Pre-baking breaded tofu. I make the cubes for supper, and the slabs for making sandwiches during the upcoming week.

Preheat oven to 350 degrees and line a cookie sheet with parchment.

1. Drain tofu of marinade.
2. Dip each tofu piece into the chickpea bath, shake off excess bath.
3. Dip and roll each piece in your breading mixture.
4. Place pieces one by one onto cookie sheet.
5. Spray each piece with a fine mist of cooking spray or oil (I have a refillable oil misting bottle).
6. Cook in oven 15 minutes, turn over, spray again then repeat cooking for an additional 15 minutes.

As you can see, my cooking process is usually quite intuitive, which makes recipes hard to share, but once you figure out the basic techniques, there is so much fun to be had with creating new meals.

I served this with brown rice steamed with both dried and fresh diced mushrooms, a vinegar marinaded cucumber salad (marinade is 1/8 c rice vinegar, a splash of agave, a touch of sea-salt, 1 cup water and a bunch of dill), and a pile of stir-fried carrots and zucchini. A very simple but very satisfying meal on a summer day. Tofu prepared this way is reminiscent of baked chicken, without the cruelty and cholesterol.

Tofu is rapidly becoming one of the things I cook which my mom looks forward to trying. A year ago she would run the other way if I told her I was serving tofu.