Shine a Light

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“Not when truth is dirty, but when it is shallow, does the enlightened man dislike to wade into its waters.”
Friedrich Nietzsche

I’m just never going to be light, fluffy and superficial enough to be one of the “popular” people in any group I choose to participate in. I’ll make intense friendships with people whom I feel a genuine connectedness with, but talk of weather, sports, politics, or celebrity gossip just leave me bored and sort of uncomfortable.

This isn’t a flaw in my personality  – it’s a flaw in how humanity currently functions, and unfortunately it’s one of the aspects of my personality which makes me both unable and unwilling to “fit in”.  I’m not going to pretend that the dead elephant in the room is actually a sofa. I’m working on ways to improve this characteristic to make myself a little more comfortable, without abandoning this part of who I am, just like I’m working on improving and integrating other aspects of my personality which don’t quite function as effectively as I’d like them to.

Sometimes I wish I was different because being who I am is often painful, lonely and uncomfortable, but most of the time I know that part of my mission is to love humanity, and part of my mission is to shine a light on the darker aspects of it, love those aspects and help begin healing them.

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About couleewind

I'm a 41 year old woman from a small city in Alberta Canada. I am whimsical and bitter-sweet and am essentially a marshmallow in a porcupine suit. I collect Pez dispensers and books and I love to talk, although I do tend to be fairly introspective. The sort of content which you will find here will vary depending on the day, my mood and what’s going on in my world or of interest to me. I mainly blog as method of reflecting on my day and on my life at the time of the post. I have a history of struggling with social anxiety and depression, as well as type two diabetes, and through living a plant-based, wholistically centered life I've made great strides in these areas. This blog is meant to reflect where I'm at in my life, and how I'm moving toward creating the life I see myself having in my dreams. I will often discuss, whole foods, meditation, personal growth and my day to day struggles and victories. I am also a highschool drop out who is returning to school at age 42, and a person who lives on a very tight fixed income currently, this will also be reflected in my blog.

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